Marriage and Relationship Research by Gottman, Essay Example

3 pages
571 words
University of California, Santa Barbara
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There are various ways with which a researcher can use to attain information about any theme from any group of people. Such pieces of information are normally collected to try to determine a problem and to solve it through thorough research. John Gottman, for instance, uses various means to collect information about marriages and relationships. This helps him to determine the common problems among varied types of couples and how such problems, through research and experience, can be solved. The main aim of this study is to look into John Gottmans researches of how to solve marriage and couples problems, look into some of his research methods and apply some of his research findings into the current life situation.

In the pursuit for information to fulfill his research objectives, John uses several research methods to gather marriage and relationship data. Among his several methods of data collection, he ascertains that through his research articles, the most common research and data collection method is personal and face to face interviews in his special place called the love lab. This thus marks his main data collection process that has to lead him to do such great researches about couples and relationships.

Through these processes of data collection, John Gottman has realized that indeed the current world is facing a lot of challenges in keeping marriages. According to his findings, most youths today can barely stay in any form of relationship. Most marriages break up as a result of lack of appreciation and understanding of either partner. These according to him, are the finds that lead to short-term marriages and unreliable relationships. In the process of research, John also realized that some factors could help keep marriages and other relative relationships stronger. These include; enhancing a Peron's affection map, appreciate the partner's admiration and fondness and giving one's partner an opportunity to influence you and try to solve their problem that can be solved and always be free to share their upcoming challenges. There are some of the main tips, according to John, that keeps marriages strong.

One relatable instance that can be compared to the cases being addressed by John Gottman was a friend's relationship that was doing well previously until recently when one of the partners started to become insecure and though that his girlfriend was cheating on him. Instead of addressing his trust issues with her, he kept quit and started acting cold assuming that the girlfriend will realize. Their relationship ended at last as the girl also thought that her partner started changing. Just like in the research and conclusion, this scenario was relatable and almost the same. This could have been easily solved by the two sharing their instincts and trying to solve their problems as per the recommendations suggested by John Gottman.

In future, when married or in a relationship, I will apply the findings and recommendations of John by first letting understanding and trust be the first pallor of the relationship. These are the foundation of any strong relationship according to Gottman. I will also be free and always talk to my partner whenever I have anything to share, a problem or a suggestion that I would like to bring up. Since the key to make one feel nice and happy in a relationship is by appreciating the little thing being done by the other partner, I will appreciate all the efforts by the other partner.


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