Essay Sample on Parenting Styles

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Sewanee University of the South
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Among the key reasons pointed out as the reason why we have this kind of parenting is the cultural background of the society. There are some communities which firmly believe in the hierarchical structure of the society, and young people never question what their elders. As such what is set out as guiding structure by the elders should be adhered to. Equally, there are those that believe the only way to bring up a child is to subject them to some strict societal rules and regulations. Any deviation from the rules is viewed as deviant behavior and is met with severe punishment (Frick, Barry, & Kamphaus, 2009).

Parents who were brought up in authoritarian set up and believed that this was the best upbringing method will most likely replicate the same kind of parenting to their children. These parents will find it easy to resonate with this parenting style and will not find any impetus to deviate and try another parenting style. Personal attitudes and beliefs also contribute to this parenting style. Some parents believe that there is no other way of bringing up the children other than through the iron fist. They will, therefore, set out rules and expect the children to follow them to the end (Frick, Barry, & Kamphaus, 2009).

Individuals brought up in this kind of parenting style find it hard to think on their own. They are usually engineered to believe that the rules set out by their parents are the best benchmark of what needs to be done. Also, they are often withdrawn socially and tend to conform to any set of rules given to them by the society. Rather than contribute to improving the existing social order, they just take it as it is. At times they usually develop low self-esteem and harbor some sense of resentment to the authorities. The low self-esteem is often brought by the fact that they have been brought up believing that they cannot contribute anything meaningful to the society and their role is to follow the laid down procedures (Frick, Barry, & Kamphaus, 2009).

The third form of parenting is the authoritative parenting style. This borders on the authoritarian style of parenting but it allows some room for freedom to the child. This style is child-centric in the sense that the parent sets out high expectations for the child regarding discipline and social achievements while on the other end provides the necessary support needed to achieve the expectations. There is some mutual understanding between the child and the parents when the rules and expectations are set out (Plotnik & Kouyoumdjian, 2013).

Seven general features characterize this kind of parenting. First is the fact that parents listen to their children. The child's independence is encouraged in this set-up. Limits and consequences are spelled out to the child while explaining to them their expected behavior. Warmth and a sense of nurturance are extended to the child while guiding them. Children are allowed to express their opinions within the laid out rules and procedures. There is room for children to discuss their options in this kind of parenting. Lastly, a fair and consistent level of discipline is administered to any errant child (Plotnik & Kouyoumdjian, 2013).

Persons brought up in this kind of a setup tend to have better emotional control. This is due to the constant training given to the children on how to carry them in various social settings. Individuals here tend to have better social skills. They are usually well cultured to assess different scenarios and to understand their expected limits in these situations. Because they are allowed room to express their opinions, they tend to have self-confidence and belief in themselves (Plotnik & Kouyoumdjian, 2013).

Lastly we have the neglectful parenting style. In some literature, it is also referred to as the uninvolved parenting style. In this parenting, the parent is entirely disengaged either physically or emotionally from the child's upbringing. In some instances, they only contribute to providing the basic needs and let the kids fend for any other secondary needs (Selin, 2013).

Among the reasons fronted to explain why this parenting style exists is the social, educational or cultural background of the parents. Some societies condone this style of parenting especially in areas where the moral fabric of the society is not upheld. Individuals in these communities are never castigated for failing to look after their children, and there are usually weak structures in place to take care of any neglected children. In some cases, it is hereditary in the sense that parents raised without any form of guidance and attention might not find it necessary or might not know how to extend care and direction to their children (Selin, 2013).

Some parents are usually too busy in their lifestyle that they might not accord enough time to their children. This is especially in the case where the parents are engaged in highly demanding careers. In this instance, parents delegate parenting roles to day-care centers or nannies. Lastly, parents who have negative social lifestyles such as drug abuse or alcohol addiction might find it difficult to be meaningfully engaged in constructive parenthood (Selin, 2013).

The main outcome of this parenting is usually a delinquent individual who is constantly in trouble with the authorities. This is a consequence of a lack of guidance during the individual's formative stage of life. People from this setting are usually prone to anxiety disorders, stress, and fear. The uncertainty in the environment in which they are brought up is usually the cause of this. There is usually high chances that the individual may also resort to alcoholism and drug abuse to mask his or her loneliness or as a result of lack of guidance. Eventually, most of these people end up being socially withdrawn (Selin, 2013).

The affection and warmth that come with permissive parenting style are needed during the child's upbringing. However, caution needs to be exercised so that this warmth and affection does not translate into giving the child a free hand to do what they deem fit in the society. Rules and regulations set in the authoritarian style of parenting should be used as a way of guiding the child and not a means of gaining power and control over them. The uninvolved parenting style has nothing desirable and as much as possible the society needs to find ways of supporting the children from this kind of families (Selin, 2013).

The authoritative parenting style blends the right features of the permissive style of parenting and the authoritarian style of parenthood. This makes it the ideal form of parenting that should be adopted in a perfect family set up. Parenting should assist the children to grow into an all-rounded individual who understands there is good and bad. It should allow them to make mistakes along the way and learn from these mistakes while giving guidance on how to avoid pitfalls in the society (Plotnik & Kouyoumdjian, 2013).



Frick, P. J., Barry, C. T., & Kamphaus, R. W. (2009). Clinical assessment of child and adolescent personality and behavior (3rd ed.). Dordrecht: Springer Science & Business Media.

Plotnik, R., & Kouyoumdjian, H. (2013). Introduction to psychology (10th ed.). Massachusetts: Cengage Learning.

Selin, H. (2013). Parenting across cultures: Childrearing, motherhood and fatherhood in non-western cultures. Dordrecht: Springer Science & Business Media.



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