Essay on Anger Management

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Boston College
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Research paper
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Anger is simply an emotion that could range from mild annoyance to intense range. Indeed, it is a feeling that is accompanied by biological changes in a body. When one gets angry, the heart rate and body pressure rise and stress hormones are released (Siegman & Smith, 2013). As a result, the reacts in certain ways including becoming hot, sweaty, or feeling out of control (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002). Anger can result in adverse behaviors such as throwing things, criticizing, or ignoring (Meichenbaum, 2017). In most cases, anger can lead to violence if not properly controlled. Some individuals use anger as an excuse to abuse others. Anger management is about understanding anger and the reasons why people get angry. It is also about learning and practicing better ways of expressing it. Anger management entails knowing how to prevent anger from happening. Therefore, it is all about understanding the triggers and early signs of anger and learning how to control it before it gets out of control. The current study will investigate gender differences in anger management.

Understanding why Anger is a Problem

In most situations, anger is associated with frustration. Therefore, it is a response to negative emotions, or it is linked with negative emotions. One can express anger out of fear, feeling hurt, disappointed, embarrassed, worried, or frustrated. It can also result in poor communication between people as well as misunderstanding. Anger is a normal human emotion and does not become a problem if it is appropriately managed (DeFoore, 2007). Indeed, everyone gets angry. In fact, it might be useful to express strong feelings and deal with situations that cause anger. However, it is wrong to express anger in harmful ways. Therefore, anger becomes a problem when it is likely to create trouble for the health or the day-to-day living of an individual. It is also a problem when it disturbs the wellbeing of others or law the law of the land. It is also a problem when the people around are frightened or feel that they cannot approach or talk to an individual when he or she is angry.

Signs that anger is a problem include situations where it involves verbal, physical, emotional, or psychological abuse. Additionally, anger could adversely affect relationships and work and could affect situations that are not directly related to the original event. Also, research has shown that anger could make someone anxious or depressed or could make one use alcohol and other drugs to manage it (Meichenbaum, 2017).

Why Manage Anger

It is important to control anger since it is never a good solution to problems. Although it may appear to be a short-term solution, anger could end up creating problems if unmanaged. The problems include having challenges at work, personal relationships, verbal fights, or damaged property. In the past, some people argued that it is beneficial to vent out anger. However, current research shows that venting anger and aggression does not resolve the situation but instead creates more problems (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002). On the other hand, it is wrong to sit on or hide anger. Instead, specialists advice people to express anger in a controlled in a way that they will release some feelings to tackle the issues that makes him or her angry (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002).

Ways of Managing Anger

First, one should to recognize the situations that make him angry and identify the warning signs of anger. Then, he or she should acknowledge the things that make him angry such as running late for an appointment or being for something that he or she did not do (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002). Undeniably, knowing what makes one angry ahead of time enables him or her to avoid such situations or do something different when such situations occur. At the same time, it is crucial to know the things that happen to the body to tell someone that she or he is getting angry. For instance, one might experience heat pounding, jaw tense, gritting the teeth, faced flash, sweating, or tightening of the chest. Recognizing these signs help in calming oneself before the anger gets out of control. For instance, changing environment by taking a break prepares one to handle situations better.

Ways of managing anger include controlling the thinking, taking time out, using distraction, relaxation, learning assertiveness skills, and trying to acknowledge what is making one angry. First, the thinking of an individual can get exaggerated and irrational when he or she is angry. It is essential to replace such kinds of thoughts with more useful and rational ones that would calm the situation. Experts encourage people to practice self-talk where they develop a list of things to say before, during, and after situations that make them angry (Epstein, 2016). For instance, one could tell himself that he does not feel great at the moment but things could be worse if he expresses anger. Indeed, is more useful to focus on how to manage anger rather than to expect the people around to behave in a calm manner. Secondly, taking time out helps one to calm. Therefore, it is essential to go for a walk or step out of the room and resume when the situation is calm. Also, one can read a novel to help in calming the situation

It is essential to acknowledge what is making someone angry by admitting it to oneself and others. It is more useful to tell people that they made you angry when they said or did something rather than expressing the anger. Also, be cautious not to hurt people who are close or those that have less power (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002). Besides, it is essential to run-through the anger management skills by imagining yourself in situations that set off the anger (Elwood, Soper, & Olatunji, 2015). Then, one should try to imagine resolving the situation without anger. It is also useful to rehearse the skills with a friend and ask them to help you to act out of a situation without anger (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002).

Lastly, one can seek help from a psychologist if the anger is out of control. Such a specialist can assess whether the anger is a problem and help an individual to understand his or her anger. This helps someone to identify ways of venting anger in the right way. APS specialists can also provide additional resources that help in managing anger including support groups, books, as well as courses (Kassinove & Tafrate, 2002). Such psychologists can also help in managing other problems that are caused by anger including violence, depression, and difficulties in the personal life.

Gender Differences in Anger Management

It is essential to note that men and women express and manage anger in different ways. Most men believe that anger is a reasonable way of expressing their fury (Siegman & Smith, 2013). Therefore, anger is their primary emotion. On the other hand, most women choose to burry anger under tears. Fisher and Evers (2011) concluded that females express subjective anger or self-anger compared to males. Therefore, the signs of anger might vary according to gender. This might suggest that each gender requires distinct anger management skills. However, inconsistencies exist in the literature regarding anger differences in gender. For instance, Zimprich and Mascherek (2012) found no significant anger differences between females and males. The authors asserted that both genders encounter similar levels of anger. However, both men and women can express annoyance or respond to situations differently.


Anger management is simply about learning as well as practicing better ways of expressing it. It is essential to recognize the situations that make one angry and identify the visible signs such as heart pounding, jaw tense, gritting the teeth, faced flash, or sweating. If not managed, anger could destroy relationships and lead to other problems such as depression, high blood pressure, or heart attack. The current analysis sought to investigate gender differences in anger management. Contradicting studies show that researchers are unclear as to whether there are gender differences in anger expression. Some researchers believe that there are no significant anger differences between females and males suggest that both genders should use similar anger management approaches. However, researchers who believe that females express subjective anger or self-anger compared to males might suggest that both genders require distinct anger management strategies.


DeFoore, W. G. (2007). ANGER MANAGEMENT TECHNIQUES.Elwood, L. S., Soper, J. N., & Olatunji, B. O. (2015). Anger Management Techniques. The Encyclopedia of Clinical Psychology.Epstein, N. B. (2016). Anger Management Self-Talk. Techniques for the Couple Therapist: Essential Interventions from the Experts, 111.Fischer, A. H., & Evers, C. (2011). The social costs and benefits of anger as a function of gender and relationship context. Sex Roles, 65(1-2), 23-34.

Kassinove, H., & Tafrate, R. C. (2002). Anger management: The complete treatment guidebook for practitioners. Impact Publishers.Meichenbaum, D. (2017). ANGER MANAGEMENT. The Evolution of Cognitive Behavior Therapy: A Personal and Professional Journey with Don Meichenbaum, 125.

Siegman, A. W., & Smith, T. W. (Eds.). (2013). Anger, hostility, and the heart. Psychology Press.Zimprich, D., & Mascherek, A. (2012). Anger expression in Swiss adolescents: Establishing measurement invariance across gender in the AX scales. Journal of adolescence, 35(4), 1013-1022.

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